He’s got the biggest high heel shoes in the dressing room at the local dive bar. By day he’s a fitness instructor, by night she’s the diva doing splits and death drops to the latest hits down at the Golden Rail. He takes the longest to get ready for a show because he has a lot to tuck.
ROYAL MAJESTY.
Brave knight in bronze armor.
He’s the silent hero who will rescue you from trouble and offer you a hot cup of tea. Strong, reliable, and the one who will never break, even when he’s under pressure. He’ll get you where you need to go, so don’t be afraid to let loose and go hard on him.
PROTECT AND SERVE.
It’s a race to the finish line with them.
They are the work-hard-play-hard type. Not into romantic gestures; get in the zone, and get the job done. A race car driver who can go as fast (and long) as they want, whether in the pit-stop or out on the racetrack. Caught in a time loop of endless fun.
READY SET GO!
She plays by the law of the jungle.
A bohemian girl who likes roughing it with someone (or two) back at the campground. Listens to what her body tells her. Hungry? She’s got a non-GMO garden growing in her backyard. Horny? She just drops by her hunky neighbor’s campervan.
POWER OF NATURE.
Lady of the Finger Lakes with a magic tongue.
She’s ready to play Rock, Paper, Scissors with the girls, and always wins with the last option. Her go-to emoji is the peach. There was more than one thing soaked at last year’s spring break wet t-shirt contest. She’s just one lick away from making you happy in 69 ways.
LET THE GAMES BEGIN!
No rest with this wild child.
She looks like a good Italian Catholic girl. But this is where the similarity ends... If carnal pleasures are not on your mind, don’t go to hers thinking that you’ll just cuddle in front of the TV. You will always be jealous of her spoiled little puppy.
HEART ON FIRE.
A Sleeping Beauty with handcuffs under her pillow.
She’s had as many boyfriends as you’ve had nights playing alone in bed looking at pictures of your ex. She enjoys a good cry over a bottle of cabernet while watching Dirty Dancing. An hour later, she’s at the bar and pulls you in faster than you can run away.
LIKE AN ANGEL.
The hunter who never sleeps.
He’s the black hawk that never goes down…unless you want him to. His shot never misses. But deer are not his prey. Leaves his lair after nightfall and returns at dawn. He won’t be your ray of sunshine. Always takes his coffee black.
MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
A composed type with an aristocratic vibe.
Girls in his class go weak in the knees at the sight of him. After watching eight hours of porn, he watches two hours of a nature documentary on climate change. He’s the man your grandma will absolutely adore…if she doesn’t see his dickpics on your phone.
CAESAR RULES!
Extra-large and almighty condom that expands to accommodate in all directions.
Smooth & anatomically flare-shaped condom with reservoir tip (width: 57 mm, length: 190 mm, regular wall). Natural color & fragrance-free.
Premium medical-grade silicone oil provides sensual silky-smooth lubrication. Without nitrosamines, spermicides, parabens, and other yucky things.
FDA approved, 100% electronically tested, thus reliable – except in cases of human error.
Secure and extra-thick condom that keeps you safe in heavy-duty conditions.
Smooth & anatomically flare-shaped condom with reservoir tip (width: 54 mm, length: 190 mm, extra-thick wall). Natural color & fragrance-free.
Premium medical-grade silicone oil provides sensual silky-smooth lubrication. Without nitrosamines, spermicides, parabens, and other yucky things.
FDA approved, 100% electronically tested, thus reliable – except in cases of human error.
Functional super-powered condom with double-reinforced rim (O-ring) for your titanic erection.
Smooth & straight-shaped condom with reservoir tip (width: 53 mm, length: 190 mm, regular wall). Natural color & fragrance-free.
Premium medical-grade silicone oil provides sensual silky-smooth lubrication. Without nitrosamines, spermicides, parabens, and other yucky things.
FDA approved, 100% electronically tested, thus reliable – except in cases of human error.
3-in-1 textured pattern multipurpose condom with extended comfort fit.
Anatomically flare-shaped condom with reservoir tip (width: 56 mm, length: 190 mm, regular wall). Natural color & fragrance-free.
Premium medical-grade silicone oil provides sensual silky-smooth lubrication. Without nitrosamines, spermicides, parabens, and other yucky things.
FDA approved, 100% electronically tested, thus reliable – except in cases of human error.
Slick and ultra-thin extra lubricated condom.
Smooth & straight-shaped condom with reservoir tip (width: 53 mm, length: 190 mm, ultra-thin wall). Natural color & fragrance-free.
Premium medical-grade silicone oil provides sensual silky-smooth lubrication. Without nitrosamines, spermicides, parabens, and other yucky things.
FDA approved, 100% electronically tested, thus reliable – except in cases of human error.
Ribbed and dotted rugged condom for intensive stimulation.
Anatomically flare-shaped condom with reservoir tip (width: 54 mm, length: 190 mm, regular wall). Natural color & fragrance-free.
Premium medical-grade silicone oil provides sensual silky-smooth lubrication. Without nitrosamines, spermicides, parabens, and other yucky things.
FDA approved, 100% electronically tested, thus reliable – except in cases of human error.
A condom so thin that you forget you have it on.
Smooth & straight-shaped condom with reservoir tip (width: 53 mm, length: 190 mm, ultra-thin wall). Natural color & fragrance-free.
Premium medical-grade silicone oil provides sensual silky-smooth lubrication. Without nitrosamines, spermicides, parabens, and other yucky things.
FDA approved, 100% electronically tested, thus reliable – except in cases of human error.
A condom as dark as your goth sister’s clothes.
Smooth & anatomically flare-shaped condom with reservoir tip (width: 54 mm, length: 190 mm, regular wall). Natural color & fragrance-free.
Premium medical-grade silicone oil provides sensual silky-smooth lubrication. Without nitrosamines, spermicides, parabens, and other yucky things.
FDA approved, 100% electronically tested, thus reliable – except in cases of human error.
Imperial quality condom for all earthly pleasures.
Smooth & straight-shaped condom with reservoir tip (width: 53 mm length: 190 mm regular wall). Natural color & fragrance-free.
Premium medical-grade silicone oil provides sensual silky-smooth lubrication. Without nitrosamines, spermicides, parabens, and other yucky things.
FDA approved, 100% electronically tested, thus reliable – except in cases of human error.
